Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath – Eph. 4:26
The Message says it like this:
Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life.
It’s true. Don’t let your anger drive you to say hurtful things just because you feel hurt. Don’t shut the other person out. Don’t threaten to leave; don’t threaten divorce. This is the one you love. How much better is it to be humble and hold your heart out for a chance to come to an understanding?
We’ve had numerous opportunities to explore conflict resolution, given that our personality types are so similar (with the introversion/extroversion difference):
A couple of times, much to my regret, I have gone to bed angry and every time I wished we’d never fought. So my advice is don’t go to bed angry. Going to bed angry makes for the worst sleep, and you know it. 😉
Be determined to forgive. It’s not ever about “being the bigger person” in the relationship. That’s a misguided approach and a counterfeit of forgiveness. It’s about learning to lay down your rights, your feelings and your hurt to get ahold of something far better.
Oh yes, this blog comes with a cheesy video/song that I love because it’s sweet: